In bed again trying to feed myself some peace. I wish the nights will extend for days. Yet the more I want to stretch the hours, they seem to come sneaking up on me. I guess it is because sleep is becoming more like a stranger that the mornings come visit so early. Often, I hold on to those last hours in the morning staring at the darkness, listening to my heart. Defining thoughts that are weighing on my mind. Outside, the rush of wind is evident. It rustles between plants, shaking the leaves down. Crushing the flowers... just blowing. One time I opened the window and I was taken by surprise. I didn't know California wind can be so vicious and so cold. A bird flying against it would surely break its wings. One good thing to know, the ground is always there to nourish the broken. It will never be an infinite fall...
There is so much in this world that is purely fascinating if not repugnant. There is just a thin line that separates the sides you chose to belong. Often, I find myself in between trying to balance it out. Emotions are my first line of defense. It clearly defines the person that I am. I do not pretend to be better, more knowledgeable, or more wiser than anybody else. I am plain and ordinary. And though put on a lot of faces in my lifetime, I stayed sincere to my friends and family. I am humbled by their love and their never ending support... As for my Daughter Alyssa, she holds the key to my true self. After the masquerade is over, she leads me home. And as the night falls outside, she blankets me with honesty. Her innocent eyes take me to the deepest recesses of my heart where I lock up all my honest emotions. And as I freely shed tears, she comforts me with a loving a hug. By that alone, I already am healed...
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